If you’ve been working on any self-improvement or self-development lately, you may have heard the advice to “find your why.” But what does it mean to find your personal why, why is it important, and how do we do it?
Knowing your “why,” or “personal why statement,” is vital in following through on your goals and achieving the life you want.
You can find your why by focusing on the way you want your life to feel rather than on the way you want your life to look.
Let’s explore everything you ever wanted to know about finding your “why” or creating your “personal why statement” including a list of examples.
What is your why?
Your “why” also called your “personal why” is your purpose for setting out towards a goal. A good why goes below the surface level and speaks to your values: How would it would feel to be the person you’re trying to become or have the life you’re trying to build?
Your “why” is going to be different than anyone else’s. It should be deeply personal and spark feelings of vulnerability when you unearth it. That’s because determining your why is about clarifying who you really want to be in your life. And that kind of honesty can be scary because it means admitting to yourself that you’re not there yet and you may have a long way to go.
The importance of knowing your Personal why
Knowing your personal why is incredibly important to the likelihood that you follow through on your goals and successfully reach your dreams and fulfill your purpose.
How many times have you attempted something new and challenging with all the enthusiasm in the world, only to discover that within a few weeks you’ve lost the spark to keep going? It’s not a lack of good intentions, it’s a lack of a stable foundation to fall back on when the motivation runs thin and you have to rely on discipline.
Determining your personal mission statement and knowing your why provides you with an accessible reminder that what you’re working towards is worth the hardships, setbacks, and disappointments.
What is your why? Examples
If you’ve been asked “what is your why,” it may feel challenging to be vulnerable and uncover your honest personal why statement.
You’re not alone in feeling reluctant to admit your deepest desires and grandest vision for your future. Hopefully these real examples of “personal why’s” in response to the question “what is your why” are helpful.
What is your why for losing weight? Examples:
- To be able to play with my children without getting winded
- To be able to go up the stairs without my knees hurting
- To be able to walk around on vacation without chafing
What is your why for starting a morning routine? Examples:
- To curb my temper and improve my relationship with my spouse
- To stop having panic attacks
- To lower my blood pressure so I don’t have health issues like my parent did
What is your why for starting a business? Examples:
- To be able to create jobs for people I love
- To have the financial freedom to get my family out of debt
- To have something to pass on to my children
What is your why for going back to school? Examples:
- To set a good example for my children
- So I can get out of debt, improve my credit, and afford to buy a house for my family
- To make sure I don’t regret not going in 10 years
What is your why for saving money? Examples:
- To be able to afford Christmas gifts this year without going into debt
- To help my sister pay for her wedding
- To go on a cruise to the Caribbean next summer
What is your why for being sober? Examples:
- To be more clear-headed while I’m beginning a new relationship, unlike last time
- To improve my depression and anxiety symptoms
- To prove to myself that I can do hard things
How to find your why
How do you find your why and write your personal why statement and how can you be sure it’s a good enough why to get you through the hard times?
You’ll find your personal why by continuing to ask yourself “but, why?” until you reach the answer that strikes a personal, emotional chord. It’s okay to start with a more surface level answer and continue to move deeper and deeper until you find an answer that is feelings-based rather than ego-based.
Just don’t stop until you reach a why that is deeply personal, feelings-based, and inspires you to get started as soon as possible.
For example, if the question is: Why Do You Want to Lose Weight?
You might answer: “To look good in a bathing suit this summer.”
But, Why?
You might answer: “So that I don’t miss out on anything at the beach this summer because I’m feeling insecure.”
But, Why?
You might answer: “So that I can be present in every moment with my family and feel loved and connected while my kids are still young enough to want to hang out with me.”
And with that, you may have found your why.
How to know if you’ve chosen a good personal why
You’ll know that you’ve identified a powerful why if it inspires you to get up and get moving on your goal as soon as possible.
Sometimes this exercise can reveal motivations for goals that you didn’t even realize you had! Self-development is an ongoing process. But without deep, purposeful reasons for improving yourself, it feels like an uphill battle every step of the way. Shallow, surface-level personal mission statements aren’t enough to get you over the inevitable bumps in the road.
I’m a firm believer that your personal why statement should be just that—personal. You don’t have to share it with anyone unless you want to. If you’re someone who benefits from having a supporter on your team who can help keep you on the right track, then by all means, share your why with your chosen confidant. But remember, your why is all about finding intrinsic motivation—so if your why doesn’t feel powerful enough to be self-sustaining, consider going deeper to find a better why.
Or, perhaps, consider whether this goal is really worth your time and energy after all.
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Mary Christina
Hey, I'm Mary! My background is in Psychology and I'm a certified Health Coach and Meditation Teacher. I'm also a mental health advocate and believer in personal development as medicine. I write because I'm hopeful that my experiences and learnings as a human are helpful to you--wherever you are.
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